The play has been sent out to the drama group and am biting my fingernails waiting for a response. It’s got some controversial issues and as always once I send out something to the public, I begin to panic and think that it’s a useless, pathetic piece of work.
Until I can figure out how to be positive and confident, I’m working on just ignoring the self-bashing bit and sending it out anyway. The way I reason with myself is this – my life has had a long list of embarrassments and I’ve turned as red as I possibly (and humanly!) can, so how can anything else in the future be worse?
I really need to stop doubting my work and start trusting God. I’ve constantly worked at making my work a means of spreading Islam either directly or indirectly, and that means everything I write begins with Allah (SWT) in my intentions. I don’t know how sincere I manage to make the intention, but if the work touches someone, I can take that as a sign, can’t I?
I read on the al-Islam homepage hadith that Imam Ali (a) said not to turn away blessings with ingratitude. So I’d better start being grateful like crazy, because I don’t think anyone has been blessed more than me, or deserves it less.